I have been absent from the blog for a while. I could give a lot of reasons as to why, but really I just haven't really felt like posting. Yes things have been busy: work, grad school, being a mom and a wife, but mostly I have had a post swimming around in my head for the past several months and I just wasn't sure that I wanted to write it. Mostly, I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings by what I wanted to say so I've just delayed putting anything down on "paper". I've decided to go ahead with my post....and please remember that these are my feelings and that I don't intend to hurt anyone else with them.
I remember when I found out that we were not going to be able to give Owen a sibling that I went through a little grieving process but then moved on with my life. I knew things wouldn't be different, so why should I sit around and wallow in that fact. One of my IVF friends (who also was only going to be able to have 1 baby) told me that she herself felt the same way, but when her friends started having 2nd babies it got a little tough. That is where I am right now. Literally for the past year I have been surrounded by pregnant people...our friends, coworkers....it seemed like everyone was having a baby. While the majority were first babies, we had a few friends get pregnant with 2nd babies. This was a little harder on me than I would like to admit. Yes I was excited for them, but it hit a little closer to home that Owen would be an only child. It only made me feel worse when he would talk about playing with his "friends" or asking if they could come over to play. I know that he has to get lonely at times being there by himself and when I see him with other kids and how excited he gets, it makes me (and Tony) a little sad that he won't have anyone else around at home to play with or talk to except us. We've tried to get him involved in other activities with kids, which has helped me feel better, but I still feel like I have failed him in this aspect. Oh and my IVF friend who I mentioned earlier in the paragraph...she just had her 2nd baby! Again, I don't feel animosity towards any one of these people and I am grateful that no one has to go through what I've had to go through...but I have to admit that when others had 2nd babies, it was a little harder than I expected.
Well, there it is...hopefully I can move on and blog about other things now:)
A Hope, A Wish, A Dream
a journey through infertility to family
Friday, May 24, 2013
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Owenisms-Take Two
Another post with some fun sayings from our boy:
When he is upset about something:
"I'm very disappointed in ______!" or
"That makes me very cross!" (from Thomas the Train)
We have a home gym in our basement that we use regularly. In the gym we have an air purifying fan that we have been known to sit in front of after a hard workout to help us cool down. If Owen sees us, he comes over, turns the fan so he thinks it is blowing on us (although really it isn't!) and says:
"Here mom, this will help warm you off!"
When we leave in the morning and walk into the garage he says:
"Turn the garage on mom."
He had his first "fruit by the foot" treat at Valentine's Day-one of his treats from preschool. He thought it was really cool and now will ask for "Head to Toe" treats all the time :)
When talking about going to Bass Pro and seeing all the big fish one morning, he says:
"Mom there is a fish there with a really long nose. His name is a scar." I'm assuming he means the gar:)
While building his first ever snowman with daddy while I was at class, he told Tony:
"When mom sees this she will be SO surprised. She won't believe her eyes!" (It was a pretty good snowman!)
For Preschool he takes a sandwich in his lunch. Since we don't have bread at our house (don't eat it enough to justify buying it) my mom makes his sandwich. She has been asking him lately if he would like PBJ or Ham on his sandwich. This week he told her "Ham with salad on it" (lettuce). She told him she didn't have lettuce, but he said he still wanted the ham sandwich. For good measure, she threw a piece of cheese on it but didn't tell him that she did. On the way home, this was their conversation:
Gramma: "Did you eat your ham sandwich?"
Owen: "I didn't ask for cheese."
G: "I know, did you eat your sandwich."
O: "I didn't eat the cheese, I didn't ask for it."
G: "Ok, so did you eat your ham?"
O: "Yes, I asked for ham."
While in the restroom at a restaurant with Tony's aunt over the weekend (we were out of town) a co-worker saw him. After confirming that he was indeed my child she says: "I work with your mommy" and he replies "Not surprised!"
Oh....that kid! Love him though:)
When he is upset about something:
"I'm very disappointed in ______!" or
"That makes me very cross!" (from Thomas the Train)
We have a home gym in our basement that we use regularly. In the gym we have an air purifying fan that we have been known to sit in front of after a hard workout to help us cool down. If Owen sees us, he comes over, turns the fan so he thinks it is blowing on us (although really it isn't!) and says:
"Here mom, this will help warm you off!"
When we leave in the morning and walk into the garage he says:
"Turn the garage on mom."
He had his first "fruit by the foot" treat at Valentine's Day-one of his treats from preschool. He thought it was really cool and now will ask for "Head to Toe" treats all the time :)
When talking about going to Bass Pro and seeing all the big fish one morning, he says:
"Mom there is a fish there with a really long nose. His name is a scar." I'm assuming he means the gar:)
While building his first ever snowman with daddy while I was at class, he told Tony:
"When mom sees this she will be SO surprised. She won't believe her eyes!" (It was a pretty good snowman!)
For Preschool he takes a sandwich in his lunch. Since we don't have bread at our house (don't eat it enough to justify buying it) my mom makes his sandwich. She has been asking him lately if he would like PBJ or Ham on his sandwich. This week he told her "Ham with salad on it" (lettuce). She told him she didn't have lettuce, but he said he still wanted the ham sandwich. For good measure, she threw a piece of cheese on it but didn't tell him that she did. On the way home, this was their conversation:
Gramma: "Did you eat your ham sandwich?"
Owen: "I didn't ask for cheese."
G: "I know, did you eat your sandwich."
O: "I didn't eat the cheese, I didn't ask for it."
G: "Ok, so did you eat your ham?"
O: "Yes, I asked for ham."
While in the restroom at a restaurant with Tony's aunt over the weekend (we were out of town) a co-worker saw him. After confirming that he was indeed my child she says: "I work with your mommy" and he replies "Not surprised!"
Oh....that kid! Love him though:)
Monday, February 4, 2013
Family & 3-year Pictures
So, I am totally late in getting these pictures up and posted! We had them taken at the end of October! It was an interesting photo session to say the least! We went to one of the local parks and had a friend of Tony take the pictures again. We wanted the whole family, so the dog came along as well. Needless to say, both Owen and the dog ran around like crazy the whole time. By the end of the session, we were all totally frustrated! We ended up getting a few good shots though:) Here are some of my favorites!
Monday, January 28, 2013
Nighttime Troubles Update
I wanted to get on and let everyone know how things were going with Owen's nighttime troubles.
1. Nighttime Invasions: Unfortunately, these have not gotten any better. There are still some nights that he is in our room 2 times a night and others not at all. It is still a little bit of a shock when we wake up in the morning and haven't been awoken at all. We did have a few nights over the weekend where he would wake up wet (we had stopped taking him to the bathroom before we went to bed because we didn't think that he needed it anymore). Well needless to say, we will start doing it again in hopes that this will help keep him asleep. There was also one night over the weekend when I heard him calling out for me. I went into his room and he was just waking up in his bed. He was talking about spiders and that they were in his room. I reassured him that everything was fine. He asked me to turn on the "big light" (more on that later) and I told him no, that he was fine. He asked me to stay with him for a little bit. I knelt down by his bed and he held onto my arm for a few minutes....until he was asleep again. It broke my heart a little.....he is having nightmares:(
2. Nighttime Escapes: These have gotten better! He did earn his play doh tractor (and another since then!!) so that helped a little. Plus, Tony and I discovered that he was/is afraid of the dark. One morning last week I was talking with him on the way to Gramma's about going to bed. I asked him if he was scared. (I don't normally try to put thoughts in his head, but was curious as to what his answer would be). He talked about an "echo" in his room that was in a hole behind his bed-and it had a tongue that went in and out. Later that night Tony went in to check on him and he had his room light on but was in bed. When Tony asked him about it (being scared) he asked him to "make the monsters dead daddy." We were both then heartbroken and convinced that he was scared of the dark. We have a bedside lamp (the "big light) in his room that we used when he was little and woke up so we didn't have to use the regular light in the middle of the night. We have started leaving that on and he has been better about staying in his room....notice I didn't say bed:) It usually takes 2-3 times of us checking on him before he stays in bed and is not up with his toys, but he is definitely going to bed much quicker and easier.
I hope the scared of the dark phase passes quickly! Makes this momma very sad for her little guy:(
1. Nighttime Invasions: Unfortunately, these have not gotten any better. There are still some nights that he is in our room 2 times a night and others not at all. It is still a little bit of a shock when we wake up in the morning and haven't been awoken at all. We did have a few nights over the weekend where he would wake up wet (we had stopped taking him to the bathroom before we went to bed because we didn't think that he needed it anymore). Well needless to say, we will start doing it again in hopes that this will help keep him asleep. There was also one night over the weekend when I heard him calling out for me. I went into his room and he was just waking up in his bed. He was talking about spiders and that they were in his room. I reassured him that everything was fine. He asked me to turn on the "big light" (more on that later) and I told him no, that he was fine. He asked me to stay with him for a little bit. I knelt down by his bed and he held onto my arm for a few minutes....until he was asleep again. It broke my heart a little.....he is having nightmares:(
2. Nighttime Escapes: These have gotten better! He did earn his play doh tractor (and another since then!!) so that helped a little. Plus, Tony and I discovered that he was/is afraid of the dark. One morning last week I was talking with him on the way to Gramma's about going to bed. I asked him if he was scared. (I don't normally try to put thoughts in his head, but was curious as to what his answer would be). He talked about an "echo" in his room that was in a hole behind his bed-and it had a tongue that went in and out. Later that night Tony went in to check on him and he had his room light on but was in bed. When Tony asked him about it (being scared) he asked him to "make the monsters dead daddy." We were both then heartbroken and convinced that he was scared of the dark. We have a bedside lamp (the "big light) in his room that we used when he was little and woke up so we didn't have to use the regular light in the middle of the night. We have started leaving that on and he has been better about staying in his room....notice I didn't say bed:) It usually takes 2-3 times of us checking on him before he stays in bed and is not up with his toys, but he is definitely going to bed much quicker and easier.
I hope the scared of the dark phase passes quickly! Makes this momma very sad for her little guy:(
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Christmas Program (a little delayed)
Every year our church has a Christmas program for the younger children. Owen is in the Toddler class (18 mos-3 years) and his teachers had been telling us he was going to be their star! He practiced with Gramma while he was at her house and we practiced on the weekends. He had a line to say "The baby Jesus small and new, came to save little me and you" and then they sang Happy Birthday to Jesus. He practiced well...although when he sang happy birthday he would always say a different name each time. The program also happened right around his birthday, so I was thinking that he would end up saying his name during the program:) The first part of the program was the preschool and kindergarten classes, then the toddler and nursery classes came out at the end. Needless to say, he was the star:) His teacher ended up giving him the microphone...and lets just say that he rolled with it:) The video here is of the second service, but it was definitely the better of the two videos since we were laughing and crying during the first service that the video is a little shaky! Tony got a better position for the second service and we were a little better prepared for what would happen.
He is definitely our little star:)
He is definitely our little star:)
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
NIghttime Troubles
I know that I have mentioned before that Owen was a GREAT sleeper! After the initial "cry yourself to sleep" period with his naps, he always went right to sleep without much fuss.....until now.....
Unfortunately, over the past couple of months, he has been terrible about not only going to bed, but staying in his bed during the night. The nighttime bed invasions started first. It seems that when he wakes up during the night, he immediately heads towards our bedroom and attempts to crawl into bed with us. We have never allowed him to sleep with us, except for the occasional Saturday morning when we were trying to coax a few more minutes of sleep out of him, so this is definitely a new thing for him to be doing. Dutifully, at least one time a night and sometimes two, Tony or I wake up him to crawling into our bed and pick him up and carry him back to his. (although I do admit that one of us has woken up at some point and he is all snuggled in and neither of us remember him getting into bed!!) Sometimes when we are carrying him back I swear he falls back asleep for the short trip down the hall. Other times, he wants to talk to us and makes sure that we have covered him appropriately before we head back to our room. I wondered if he started waking up due to his ears bothering him (he his always itching his ears when he is trying to get comfortable). When we have asked him about it, he says that he is worried.....He has mentioned things about monsters or bugs in his room or under his bed at times. We do what every parent does at the stage and reassure him that there is nothing there.....and continue to be surprised when we wake up in the morning without a nighttime invasion.
Now to top off the nighttime invasions of our bed, he is refusing to go to stay in his bed when we lay him down. It has been so frustrating lately....I can't even tell you!! He is very sneaky now....crawling on his hands and knees down the hallway, hiding in closets or under our bed....We started with the discipline by putting him in bed and talking, which then escalated to spanking which didn't seem to be helping either. We tried taking things away when he didn't stay in bed....then I suggested that he was looking for our reaction so we needed to just calmly put him back to bed without saying anything to him. It seemed to help, but then things got worse (and daddy can only redirect so many times before he has a hard time not reacting-sorry honey! Love you!!). I have even resorted to sitting in his room while he insistently tries to get me to talk to him. That still took 45 minutes for him to calm down enough and go to sleep.....but now I think he works up to wanting me to do that, so I stopped that too. Now we are back to putting him back to bed without a reaction. I've also offered an incentive of staying in his bed for 3 nights means he gets to earn a playdoh tractor that he has been wanting......I'm not joking when I say that it is usually about an hour every night of putting him back to bed...AHHHH! We contemplated taking away his afternoon nap, but we had a day over break where he didn't get one and it wasn't pretty....Gramma has been making sure that he is down by 1 and will wake him up by 3 at the latest to try and help at night.
So....the saga continues for now.....I hope its just a phase.....this momma and daddy are frustrated and tired!
Unfortunately, over the past couple of months, he has been terrible about not only going to bed, but staying in his bed during the night. The nighttime bed invasions started first. It seems that when he wakes up during the night, he immediately heads towards our bedroom and attempts to crawl into bed with us. We have never allowed him to sleep with us, except for the occasional Saturday morning when we were trying to coax a few more minutes of sleep out of him, so this is definitely a new thing for him to be doing. Dutifully, at least one time a night and sometimes two, Tony or I wake up him to crawling into our bed and pick him up and carry him back to his. (although I do admit that one of us has woken up at some point and he is all snuggled in and neither of us remember him getting into bed!!) Sometimes when we are carrying him back I swear he falls back asleep for the short trip down the hall. Other times, he wants to talk to us and makes sure that we have covered him appropriately before we head back to our room. I wondered if he started waking up due to his ears bothering him (he his always itching his ears when he is trying to get comfortable). When we have asked him about it, he says that he is worried.....He has mentioned things about monsters or bugs in his room or under his bed at times. We do what every parent does at the stage and reassure him that there is nothing there.....and continue to be surprised when we wake up in the morning without a nighttime invasion.
Now to top off the nighttime invasions of our bed, he is refusing to go to stay in his bed when we lay him down. It has been so frustrating lately....I can't even tell you!! He is very sneaky now....crawling on his hands and knees down the hallway, hiding in closets or under our bed....We started with the discipline by putting him in bed and talking, which then escalated to spanking which didn't seem to be helping either. We tried taking things away when he didn't stay in bed....then I suggested that he was looking for our reaction so we needed to just calmly put him back to bed without saying anything to him. It seemed to help, but then things got worse (and daddy can only redirect so many times before he has a hard time not reacting-sorry honey! Love you!!). I have even resorted to sitting in his room while he insistently tries to get me to talk to him. That still took 45 minutes for him to calm down enough and go to sleep.....but now I think he works up to wanting me to do that, so I stopped that too. Now we are back to putting him back to bed without a reaction. I've also offered an incentive of staying in his bed for 3 nights means he gets to earn a playdoh tractor that he has been wanting......I'm not joking when I say that it is usually about an hour every night of putting him back to bed...AHHHH! We contemplated taking away his afternoon nap, but we had a day over break where he didn't get one and it wasn't pretty....Gramma has been making sure that he is down by 1 and will wake him up by 3 at the latest to try and help at night.
So....the saga continues for now.....I hope its just a phase.....this momma and daddy are frustrated and tired!
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
3 Year Stats
We just got home from Owen's 3 year check-up appointment with the pediatrician. He is growing well and there are no concerns related to his general development..which is good! I did question the pediatrician again about how he is digging/itching his ears all the time. He assured me after checking them that they were fine. Both canals looked good, though there was some ear wax in each of them. He even checked the pressure and fluid level in his ears with a tympanogram. He said that the left ear had a little bit of pressure, but that it was nothing to warrant any sort of intervention at this time...so we still have no explanation as to why he is itching his ears all the time. I'm beginning to wonder if it has become a habit of some sort....who knows though....
Anyways...here are his stats:
Height: 39 inches-90%
Weight: 32 pounds-50%
Definitely no concerns with those:) He is going to be a tall skinny boy! We are finally going to move him to 2% milk too. He is definitely a growing boy:)
Anyways...here are his stats:
Height: 39 inches-90%
Weight: 32 pounds-50%
Definitely no concerns with those:) He is going to be a tall skinny boy! We are finally going to move him to 2% milk too. He is definitely a growing boy:)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)